Nowhere To Run

[Cmdr JFarrington 0]

Counselor’s Log, Stardate 07040.1

Cmdr JFarrington, MD, PhD

USS Manticore, NCC 5852-A

 

Nowhere to Run

 

For some strange reason it just didn’t seem right to scream on the bridge. That type of behavior was generally frowned upon, especially when the ship was receiving VIPs such as the esteemed Dr. Zwicky and his entourage, complete with dorsal module variations, probably in B-flat.

 

So she left.

 

Ship’s Counselor Jami Farrington bolted from her chair, nearly dived into the turbolift, ordered it to sick bay, then grabbed her head and leaned against the wall in complete, utter panic. She wanted to run. To get out. To scream to the universe that something was desperately wrong.

 

But there was no where to run, which left screaming. But not in the turbolift. That would set off a myriad of security alarms and when she stepped off the turbolift she would be met with hundreds, possibly thousands, of security personnel, phaser rifles drawn, all taking a bead on her forehead.

 

Given her present state of mind, she considered that might not be such a bad thing.

 

She all but held her breath until the lift stopped at the medical level where she could make a mad dash to Kyle’s office, they could close the door, and she could at last scream if she could hold it in no longer. Of all the crew on Manticore, Dr. Kyle Mele was one of the few who had witnessed Jami Farrington’s first encounter with the unwanted, uncontrolled psychic ability which, for some reason, had chosen now to manifest itself again.

 

Late in ‘98, at the behest of Starfleet, Manticore had investigated the strange demise of Starbase 819. It would be determined later that the starbase had been assaulted by a group of energy beings that worked much like nanite swarms. They normally existed as separate entities, but had the ability to swarm into different shapes for different purposes. In the case of Starbase 819, the energy beings had swarmed into several ships, then into one giant ship, which attacked the starbase and drained it of all energy, sentient and non-sentient. Autopsy of starbase crew revealed that they died horribly. With no evidence of weapons discharge, no infection, and no external trauma, their brain matter turned to soup and their organs to jelly.

 

Some of Manticore’s crew had also been affected, though to a lesser degree. Sovak, then Commander, experienced a psionic attack that nearly killed him. Engineer Jim Beamer was completely taken over by the beings and also barely escaped death. Jami Farrington, then Chief Medical Officer, had close contact with those who were affected and those who were killed, but it wasn’t until several weeks later she began having psychic episodes that bordered on clairvoyance. She had wondered ever since if the energy beings had anything to do with her condition.

 

Which brings us back to the present and Jami Farrington, now ship’s Counselor and bastion of sanity, sitting in Dr. Mele’s office asking him if she were going insane. Kyle’s astute, measured counsel, a liberal dose of tranquilizer, and the ensuing hours of quiet had brought her some relief. She had time to relax and reflect, and while sitting alone in her private room, using a meditative state she had cultivated over the years, this is what she resolved:

 

In nature there exists change that enables creation to survive. Some call it adaptation, some call it evolution, but by whatever name and whether that change is forced or allowed, whether it comes from a supreme being or is innate in nature itself, the fact remains: creation happened and, afterwards, came change (though some may argue that change is a part of creation, but that’s another story). Millennia of observation by sentient beings has marked this change and they have tried to explain it, each in its own hubris insisting on the validity of their explanations, and all falling woefully short of the mark simply because of their finite understanding of the universe.

 

All beings have eventually become part of this change -- willingly or no, some to a greater extent than others -- and it was into this change, this evolution or whatever one would call it, that Commander Jami Farrington had been unwillingly drawn. And she, with all her intelligence, experience, and myriad medical degrees, was at a total loss to explain it. Yet, periodically, with months and sometimes years between, Jami Farrington experienced prescience that astounded both shipmates and Starfleet Medical.

 

One would think Dr. Farrington would have rejoiced at having such an ability. Surely having foreknowledge of events meant she could either mold them or avoid them, but she lacked the one main ingredient that would enable her to accomplish that: she lacked interpretation. For all her visions, she had no inkling of their meaning, nor of whether they were past, present, or future, so she felt trapped. Useless.

 

What sense did it make? Wasn’t nature supposed to make sense, to create order out of chaos, and wasn’t unwanted change supposed to make things better? Moreover, the ability had come upon her suddenly, so she had no time to adapt. She hadn’t been born with it, neither had anyone in her family possessed such an ability, so she was stymied as to its source. Her episodes seemed to happen randomly and suddenly, lacking rhyme or reason, and therefore they threw her into a panic.

 

Hence, the screaming.

 

After all this, Jami Farrington decided that there really was no point in explaining. It really didn’t matter if the change came from simple evolution, from an energy being, or from another source. What did matter was that the change had happened and there was nothing she could do about it. Therefore, her best course of action would be to embrace the change, perhaps learn to control its effect on her, and to accept it for what it was: change.

 

She had no choice. She had to accept it. After all, in space there was no where to run.